http://mizzjellybeejuls.blogspot.com/

It seems to be a distance between me and you.. Why? Why can't you believe me for once? Why you never try to believe me at all? Why you only believe on what you feel? Why you never try to believe in what I said? Whyyyyyyy??? I never think that you have ever pick on me before, but why must you think that? I put lots of effort to let you see me, be proud of me, but why all I seen now are disappointment? I was born from one of your hormones too, but why am I being treated differently from the 2 siblings of mine? Why you have tonnes of unlimited topics to talk to them but why when it comes to me, I can just see blanks filling in my heart and mind? I have been standing in the corner watching you, it's so obvious that a kid of 3 years old could see it! But why can't you? It really breaks my heart when you shouted at me.. For the first time in my life.. I never expected it came out from you nor anyone.. What's the point I'm crying now? What's the point shedding tears while you don't seems to feel anything? Please, show me some proper attention, could you?

All I can say now is, Dad, I'm sorry, I can't be perfect....

TEO RUWEN!!!  I MISS YOU TONNNNES!!!

My throat infection is killing me ttm! Can't even swollen drinks or food properly.. Had been silence for like 2 days already.. Can't talk / sing / shout ! It seems like I have some hearing impaired or voice impaired.. So sad man! Silly let's just pray that Thursday will be tomorrow and I can go shopping with you again! Remember we need to watch Shrek, Killers and Toy Story 3 too??? So you better come back to my side ASAP!!! I think I'm pretty death of boredom if I keep sending text to you but with no reply! Hahasss Misss you too bits love!

♥

It's the first day silly did not contact me as he need to go for field camp... As usual I feel weird without his text and call for the entire day.. Miss your funny voice so much! Thanks silly for calling me this morning before you head to the mysterious jungle for 4 days even though I was half asleep while talking to you.. Be careful when you are in the jungle love.. I said that I won't  be worry or what but actually damn worry about you don't you know that??? Thinking that you this hygiene freak couldn't bath for 4 days make me feel so worry! All day long thinking that would you get rashes? Would you keep complaining? Would you take care of yourself? Would you met into danger? All that just came into my mind.. Stooopido' me! Anyway, hopefully no wild boar will chase after you if any of it discover you! Hahasss joking lar! I know you know I'm joking, right? Hehesss miss you tooo bits love! 3 days more and I'm sure we will go through it no matter what! I'll pray hard that you will be safe and healthy in the jungle! TEO RUWEN! You promised that you will meet me on Friday like usual so you must do what you had promised! OKIE!!! Love you too bits love!

4 days more exam gonna start and I really stress over it as I really did not spend much time revising on most important subjects.. Headache, worried, anxious, loss of appetite, and pimple filling up space on my skin.. Sigh, all these just suck man.. I wonder what am I thinking sometimes.. Rather spend my time on useless things than spending it on revision.. When I feel helpless, thanks to someone who is always by my side and show concern and empathy to me.. Thanks darling.. Thanks for all the support from you.. I don't know what will I do if I don't have you around me right now.. Thank you so much.. I love you..

Same goes to Shairley and Wenli.. Thanks for supporting me and cheer me up when I'm down.. Thank you so much babes!

Love you all toooo bits! =p

Few days neglected my blog and kinda feel guilty about it.. It's time to spare some little precious moment on my blog so that it won't be reluctant.. [=

Exam is always the most scariest "word" to everyone and not to mention, me too.. 2 weeks more exam is coming and I still prepare nothing but shit for it.. Just now logged in to student portal and checked the schedule.. The most shag part is the first day of exam I've got 2 papers which is MPO and Business Communication.. Shag ttm.. But I'm glad I can spend more time practicing on my Business Stats paper because it is on the last day.. After that I can have all my time relaxing and spend more hours with Darling.. I realized we have been spending lesser time together recently due to your trainings in NDU and myself have to attend classes on Saturday afternoon.. Which add more shag stress on myself! Feel so guilty! Hopefully Darling will understand but I guess you will because you are considerate person.. Really feel so happy when you old me you are willing to study together with me when I need to do so..Thank you so much Darling! Hehesss

Well, I guess for the next 2 weeks my breakfast, lunch and dinner would be instant noodles, fast food, cookies and bread.. Probably have not much time for  proper meal for these 2 weeks but I need to struggle and not to waste any minute of it! Time are so precious now and I realize 2 weeks are never enough for me to finish memorizing 4 subjects with all the theories and formulas.. Shag ttm LMAO!

Today class started from 9.30am to 5pm.. Woke up at 9am and realized I'm late for class.. Run to office to take attendance and guess how dumb can I be to forget my student card, student pass and ez-link (because I left it at home)... What the heck man? After school head to Clementi and had dinner with some classmates.. Later then went back home and rest.. Now I'm waiting for Darling to call me.. Why hasn't he call yet? I'm so sleeeeeeeeepie and guess I'm gonna knock out soon.. But miss him too bits! Can't sleep without chatting with him.. Anyway, just wait for him to call and meanwhile try to revise some MPO notes given by Adeline.. Hopefully her notes help!

[=

Ever since i had a bad dream recently, I've been moody all along.. The devil is leading me on.. And I effin' hate is so much! How I wish I could just runaway from it but I can't.. i don't feel happy recently.. I lost my happy pills.. It seems like I lost everything.. Dear God, please get rid of the devil that stays inside me and never let it return anymore! Go! Go away you bad devil in Jesus name! You can never stay inside me nor can overcome me! May God bless me!

Well, it's almost a week since "DB" went to Navy in Sembawang.. I thought i could see you yesterday but the moment i saw your message I was effin' disappointed that you said your book out was postponed.. Shag man.. On the other hand was glad that you said the officer will pay you back one of the off day next week once you get your Army Uniform.. Hahasss can't wait to see you this Friday and I hope you won't disappoint me again honey! Well, all I can say now is... MISS YOU TOOOOOOOO BITS DARLING!!! Can't wait to see you get bald.. But you said it grew longer already but heck care I still want to see it!  Hahahass

Gonna hug you tightly the moment i see you and never let you go! Hehesss

I ♥ you teasing me with my laughters..

I ♥ you telling me tonnes of lame jokes yet it is funny..

I ♥ you complaining to me that you are tired and yet it breaks my heart..

I ♥ you telling me you miss me too bits..

I ♥ you acting like a child to me with your pampered voice..

I ♥ you getting excited and telling me that you can come back during the weekends and meet me..

I ♥ you because YOU ARE JIMMY...

♥♥♥

♥

Well, too busy for bloggin' these few daesss.. Celebration, parthay, presentation & etc..

This 2010 19th Bdae celebration was ma' happiest celebration ever... Lots of happenin' events took place..

I shall start with celebration with Darling.. We celebrated our bdae' together before he went Navy as our bdae juz 4 daes' different..

Hahasss sweet of him for givin' me a surprise which is the crumpler bag.. Thxx Darling! I really love the pressiiee so much!

As for Darling's bdae, I bought him a Casio watch and a handmade bdae' card... Hope you like it Sweetheart.. hahass..

Well, a daee' before ma' bdae' which was 29th April, i went Darling's place to have dinner with his family (But he wasn't there because he's in Navy)

I never expected this will happen that his family gave me a bdae' surprise (Which was a small celebration for me!)

Even ma' own  members didn't even gimme' this kinda bdae' surprise before.. I love you guys so much!!!!

Thanks for treating me like part of the family! Sharon gave me a doll key chain and it is really very cute! (blue doll which is ma' favorite color!)

Carol gave me a handmade rose (which is blue too!) and cute bdae' card! Thank you so much! I really love it a lot!

Thanks for uncle and aunt for the warm greetings.. I really appreciate it a lot! And Jimmy Dearie gave me a second surprise!

He recorded a bdae' song sang by him and at that moment I really felt so touched that I almost cried ! Thank you so much!

And thank you, Jimmy to accompanied me til exactly 12am to wish me happie bdae'! And YES! You're the first one to wish me at 12am! hahasss

The following daee' I got presentation for Business Communication and thanks to all ma' lovely classmates for the bdae' song and wishes!

I feel so blessed ! At night, some closest friends, Rose, Vanya, Bon, Shirley, Lizanne, Adeline, and some other friends, we went to Powerhse' St'James for another blast celebration!

Everyone enjoyed themselves.. Some were drunk and some were overjoyed.. hahassss.. Thanks Bryan and Bon for the bdae' pressie.. Love it too bits!

Special thanks to all ma' friends who wished me on Facebook! Approximately 200 peep's wished me! May God bless all of you and all the best to you guys too! I love you and I know you guys know too! hahassss

This year will be ma' last year of teens and I shall learn to act and think more mature.. Should not act like a child anymore..

Ma' bdae' wish for this year will be do well in ma' studies, everyone stay happily, and most importantly, be happy wit Darling and his family!

Cheers everyone!!! [=

Bdae' cake from Sharon & CF.. So sweet of you two! [=

A sweet surprise bdae' cake from ma' room mate, Alyssa! Thank you so much love! [=

Time flies and now Ur' in Navy.. Remember how we spent the entire 2 months together till the very last minute yesterday made me feel so touched.. We went "Perhentian" together, watched movies together, have dinner together, you sent me home whenever you had ur' off daeesss, shopping together when I don't have the mood to buy something and you forced me to get it just to make sure I do well in my presentation, sharing jokes together.. And lots lots more! How can I possibly cope it all alone right now for 21 months??? I'm sure im' gonna miss all these but no matter what I will try to do it as I promised you and myself.. We will overcome it ! Right??? Your faith lights up everything in my life.. You're the one who made me happie all the time when Im' down.. Thanks darling.. When I received ur long text this morning, Im' so happie! Touched and cried... Thanks for everything that you done for me! You pray for me, you worried about me.. All those little things just made me felt so touched! From today onwards this will be my little blog to write out every details of my daily life so that when you are in navy, you know what Im' doing.. Starting to miss you so badly now.. Tried to call you but ur phone is off.. I doubt you have ur hair cut already and Im' anxious to see how you look like!!! Love you too bits' Jimmy Dearie...